Breakthrough...not Breakdown!

This week has been very emotional for me. I have struggled this week with abstinence, and hormonal issues. I have been having night sweats, getting up in the middle of the night for the last 2 nights and binging, then going to sleep on the couch depressed because those chips and cheese were just not worth it. I kept my poor husband up late the other night crying and venting about how I have no idea how I got here. I have no idea where this all went wrong. I feel like I have been kidnapped and dropped off in the middle of no where and told to find my way back. Back to normalcy and sanity.

For some divine reason I feel a calm, a light, and a peace with the long journey that lies ahead of me, and I am definitely up for the challenge. Thank you God!

I have been day dreaming about hiking, and would even like to run a 5K. Kyle even mentioned that we should do one together. I am thinking maybe in the Fall we will be ready to possibly run one.

I said this week that I was going to weigh in every Monday morning. The scale and I have been enemies for a long time. I have been discouraged the last two weeks, that this was all not worth it because every time the scale and I had a meeting it said the same ole thing...235lbs! I was feeling particularly guilty this morning about my 1 am binge last night, so as I was getting in the shower this morning I pulled the scale out and slowly stepped onto it...230lbs! I jumped off, made sure it was 0ed out and stepped on again...YAY! I have lost 5 lbs this week! Wow, it felt so good, and it was just the attitude adjustment I needed!